Subject: NEW Imran Adventure!

did the drink stuff dessicate the mouse body?

Or did he treat it as a badge of honour, like eating a tequila worm?

That's normal, you can find more disgusting things in nature. Like mr. Hamster eating little hamsters when they are still blind, can't defend themselves etc. Seen it on maths class once, I mean hamsters weren't the subject of lesson but it was quite interesting to watch.

And nothing can beat people paying to eat living monkeys brain. Did they include soundproof headphones, or what btw?

And there's always gibby. :P

if mummy & daddy hamster have 6 baby hamsters and daddy eats 4 of them, the how many baby hamsters does daddy have left over for breakfast tomorrow?

gibby is not of nature.

He was very cross. When setting up I'd had a last minute change of heart and put the mouse in a food back so as not to make it too grim. I think it had just decomposed a bit in there, that's all.

Or, in an alternative reality, the protein mix reanimated it and the world's biggest mouse burst out of the car and stomped around the country, ransacking cheese factories and leaving droppings the size of cars.

I like the alternative reality one better.

I'm agree ! Far less grisly.

I'm too agree. Hulkmouse, nice.

Right, consider history re-written. That'll confuse my brother should he ever bring it up in conversation in future.

He will believe it too. My neighbour has a musclehead lodger and I got him to believe that dogs lived in his loft as he had heard noises.

Steroids do odd things to a man...

there may be some interest from newcastle fc, they always get people like you

NEWS.

Imran (me) has applied to 3 jobs thus far in my adventure.

1: Finance Manager in County Durham. £35-£45k. I don't really know what a finance manager does exactly, but I am pretty good at managing my own finances, so it can't be that hard really. The lady on the telephone was a bit blasé about my extensive shreddies factory experience, but I am told they will be in touch when they receive my CV.

2. Electrical & Instrumentation Designer. £40k. I know it's not quite what I hoped for wage wise, but I get to design stuff! It's in a place called Newton Aycliffe which I have never heard of, but it sounds nice. It seems a perfect job. I work on my own, using my own brainpower and I get a secretary! Maybe I can fnd a new Mrs Imran? Or at least a secretary to dip once in a while.

3. History Teacher. Yes I know. It's not well paid being a teacher, but I get to mould young minds! The wage is listed as "£150 per day" but thinking about it, I will get lots of holidays, and lets be honest, talking about history is a piece of piss! Just talk about the war for a few hours. Brilliant. I am very hopeful of this one. It does ask for 6 months previous teaching experience, but I did teach the ex Mrs Imran how to use a computer and stuff. I think I will be offered this job in the next couple of weeks. The interview is a formality really.

If anyone has any job tip-offs pllease let me know. These may not be my best options.


In other news Mrs Imran, who I was never really married to, apologised yesterday and asked to come home. Sadly (for her) as she was talking to me in the kitchen, a tart who Imran impaled with meat the previous night came down hoping for breakfast. Hilarity ensued and the ex Mrs Iman remains as much. Which she would have done anyway. Well, I might have filled her with my love potion, then sent her packing.

In other, other news, I watched Kill Bill part 2 while giving it to the tart last night. It was awesome.

you are mentally disturbed, but good luck for future and well done with the tart

I agree, kill bill 2 is indeed awesome.

So what about being a traffic Warden in Tel Aviv ?