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Subject: Crap Jokes
Glad you liked it, friend tells me loads of stupid 1s. Such as...
Why did the little girl fall off her pram?
Because someone threw a fridge at her.
Not as good but same ball park :-P
Why did the little girl fall off her pram?
Because someone threw a fridge at her.
Not as good but same ball park :-P
Paddy and Murphy are walking down by the river, when they see a fisherman walking home with a really big trout.
"Excuse me there sir" asked Murphy, "how did you go about catching that fine trout?"
"Well" said the fisherman, "I was leaning over the bridge, and when he swam past I grabbed him so I did".
"Right Paddy" said Murphy, "You hold my feet and dangle me over the bridge, and when a trout swims past, I'll grab him so I will".
So Paddy holds Murphy's feet as he hangs over the bridge and waits for a trout to swim past.
20 minutes go by.
Suddenly Murphy shouts "Paddy, Paddy, pull me up quick!!"
"Have you got a trout?" asks Paddy.
"No" says Murphy, "there's a f***ing train coming!!!"
"Excuse me there sir" asked Murphy, "how did you go about catching that fine trout?"
"Well" said the fisherman, "I was leaning over the bridge, and when he swam past I grabbed him so I did".
"Right Paddy" said Murphy, "You hold my feet and dangle me over the bridge, and when a trout swims past, I'll grab him so I will".
So Paddy holds Murphy's feet as he hangs over the bridge and waits for a trout to swim past.
20 minutes go by.
Suddenly Murphy shouts "Paddy, Paddy, pull me up quick!!"
"Have you got a trout?" asks Paddy.
"No" says Murphy, "there's a f***ing train coming!!!"
I park up a side-street called Church Lane when I'm in the office for work. I walk past the graveyard on the short walk to work.
This morning, a green wheelie-bin with a sign attached to it caught my eye and I walked in to see what it said:
"Footpath closed, access to church only."
I was sure there was a joke in there somewhere, but the best I could come up with, pre-coffee, was wondering if it was a wholly holey holy footpath.
This morning, a green wheelie-bin with a sign attached to it caught my eye and I walked in to see what it said:
"Footpath closed, access to church only."
I was sure there was a joke in there somewhere, but the best I could come up with, pre-coffee, was wondering if it was a wholly holey holy footpath.
I had a ploughman's lunch the other day. He wasn't very happy.
I've taken up a part time job in a bakery. I knead the dough...